The Science of Rejection Part 2: Beyond the First 10 Pages

What Keeps Agents Reading

Last week, we talked about what makes agents stop reading in those crucial first ten pages. But what happens when your manuscript clears that hurdle? What makes us keep turning pages—or stop at page 50? 

Getting past chapter one is just the beginning. I've lost count of how many times I've been excited by a strong opening, only to find myself losing interest by page 50. Or worse, reaching page 100 and realizing the story has lost its way entirely.

This is also why I ask to see a 1-2 page synopsis. Agents aren’t paid to read, so spending 6-8+ hours reading a book is an investment of time.

When we’re reading a manuscript, it’s not only about liking the story or being intrigued by the voice. We’re looking for a clear sense of purpose in the plot and a strong story arc that feels cohesive and intentional. Without these, your manuscript can lose direction and momentum, followed by the agent’s attention.

So, here’s how agents evaluate these crucial elements beyond the opening pages. If you haven’t already, you might want to read last week’s post first: The Science of Rejection: How Agents Decide in the First Ten Pages

The Four Questions Agents Ask While Reading

When I'm reading a full manuscript, I'm constantly asking myself four key questions:

1. Is the story delivering on its initial promise?

Your opening pages set expectations for your readers (and agents). If your manuscript shifts drastically in tone or doesn’t maintain a consistent genre approach, it can feel disjointed and confusing.

If you kick things off with a high-stakes thriller scene but then spend the next hundred pages deep-diving into family drama with barely a hint of tension, or include random comedic elements, you've broken that promise.

Consistency doesn’t mean you can’t play with different tones, but they need to feel intentional and cohesive.

Tip: Be mindful of any sudden shifts in tone or genre and ask yourself if they serve the story or if they might confuse readers. Consistency reassures agents that you know the kind of story you’re telling.

2. Are the stakes escalating naturally?

Here's where many writers stumble. Raising stakes doesn't mean piling on more dramatic events—it means deepening the impact of the conflict on your character and their world.

Agents want to see stakes that deepen as the story progresses. Your protagonist’s journey should grow increasingly urgent, with obstacles that force them to make tougher choices. When stakes plateau or remain static, the story loses tension and can feel repetitive.

Tip: Identify the stakes in each part of your story. If they aren’t building or evolving, consider adding new layers of conflict or increasing the pressure on your protagonist to keep readers engaged.

3. Does every scene earn its place?

This is the ultimate test. For every scene, I ask: "Does this matter? Is it informed by the previous scene and does it organically lead to the next thing?" If I can't immediately answer why this scene matters to the story, that's a red flag.

One of the most common issues is a plot that feels like it’s just “happening” rather than unfolding with purpose. A meandering story or an abrupt ending, for example, tell us the arc hasn’t been fully thought out.

For example: if a protagonist suddenly takes an entire chapter to pursue a side quest that doesn’t add to their journey, or move the story forward, it’s an unnecessary detour that weakens the story’s direction – and slogs the pace.

Tip: Map out your scenes to see if each plot point builds on the last. If certain scenes feel disconnected, they might need reworking or deeper integration into the main plot.

Also read: Hook the Agent: Writing Strong Scenes that Keep the Pages Turning

4.     Is the Pacing Right

Pacing is all about balancing. Too fast, and we feel rushed through scenes without really investing in the characters or stakes. Too slow, and we risk losing interest as the story lingers without progress.

Agents often see manuscripts where the pacing feels uneven—either packed with action but light on character development or bogged down by backstory and unnecessary details.

Pacing is about creating a rhythm that matches the story’s genre and tone. A thriller, for example, benefits from quicker pacing and high-stakes scenes. A literary novel, on the other hand, might have a slower, more contemplative pace.

Tip: Check your pacing by reading aloud or asking a beta reader for feedback. If certain sections feel draggy or others feel like they’re moving too quickly, it’s a sign to adjust the pacing.

Story Structure Red Flags

Let's talk about the common issues that make agents stop reading at specific points:

Page 50 (sometimes sooner). This is where pacing problems become glaringly obvious. If your story hasn't found its rhythm by now, you've got some work to do.

Signs you're in trouble:

• The initial conflict has stalled

• New conflicts keep popping up without resolving earlier ones

• Characters are still in "setup" mode with no clear direction

• Unnecessary scenes or filler

The Page 100 Slump – or the Sagging Middle. This is where I see most manuscripts fall apart.

Common issues:

• The story starts hovering instead of progressing

• Subplots take over, overshadowing the main conflict

• Lack of escalating stakes

• Characters become reactive instead of proactive

By page 150-200 is when timing problems become evident. It can signal that the author didn’t fully plan the resolution, which often leads to an unsatisfying conclusion.

• Too many plot threads still dangling

• Sudden acceleration toward resolution

• Abrupt character changes

Tip: The ending should feel both inevitable and surprising, providing a satisfying payoff for the setup and conflicts established earlier in the story.

What Makes Us Keep Reading

Here's my checklist:

Strong Character Development

• Characters who grow naturally through their experiences

• Consistent but evolving personalities

• Actions that reflect their growth

Organic Plot Progression: I want to see dominoes falling—each event should naturally lead to the next. When writers rely on coincidence to move their plot forward, it breaks the spell.

Consistent Voice and Tone: Your voice in chapter 15 should feel like it belongs with chapter 1.

This doesn't mean it can't evolve, but dramatic shifts make us nervous.

Practical Tips for Self-Assessment

In addition to ensuring your writing is tight. Here's how you can evaluate your own manuscript:

The Scene + Chapter Test: For each chapter, answer these questions:

• What happens in this chapter?

• How does it advance the main conflict and/or move the story forward?

• How does it relate to the next scene?

• What would happen if I cut it entirely?

Analyze Character Development and Dialogue

Assess your characters’ arcs:

·      Do they evolve in meaningful ways that match the narrative journey?

·      Do they have clear motivations that drives their decisions?

·      Each character should have agency over their decisions—things shouldn’t just be happening to them

Try this:

·      Sketch out each main character’s journey from beginning to end. Identify their starting traits, conflicts, and goals, then map out how they change (or don’t) by the story's end.

·      For each main character, write a one-sentence summary of their primary motivation and how it drives their decisions.

Dialogue Analysis:

• Select a few key dialogue exchanges. Read them out loud to determine if they sound natural.

• Could any lines be stronger by showing, rather than telling what the character feels or thinks?

• Are all characters’ voices unique enough to differentiate them?

Try this:

Isolate several dialogue snippets, removing any identifying markers. See if you can tell who’s speaking based on the word choice, sentence structure, and tone alone.

Working with Beta Readers? Give them specific questions:

• Where did your interest flag?

• Which parts did you skim?

• What questions were you asking at each point?

• Did the ending feel earned?

Quick Reference: Agent Stop-Reading Points

·       Page 50: Where most pacing problems become evident

·       Page 100: The classic middle slump

·       Page 150-200: Where rushed endings begin to show

·       Key takeaway: Different problems surface at different points, but they often originate in early structural decisions

The Bottom Line

Here's what it comes down to: the best manuscripts don't just start strong—they get better as they go. Each chapter should compel the reader to turn the page because they must to know what happens.

Different problems surface at different points, but they often originate in early structural decisions. That's why revising isn't just about polishing prose—it's about ensuring your story's foundation is solid from start to finish.

Keep in mind –just because there’s subjectivity in certain elements of writing, doesn’t mean everything is subjective. Writing that works is objective.

Next week, we'll dive into what happens when agents request that full manuscript, and what makes us ultimately decide to offer representation—or not.  

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COMING SOON:

If you're feeling overwhelmed by the query process or unsure how to connect with agents. I’ll be offering a FREE (no sales pitch) LIVE webinar on all things Literary Agent, that will include a Q&A at the end.

I’ll have more info soon, as well as a sign-up page where you can reserve your spot and be notified of the date the webinar goes live.

Topics include:

  How To Find the Right Agent

  Crafting Attention Grabbing Queries

  Avoiding Common Query Pitfalls 

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NEW TO GRYPHON QUILL? Check out more writing tips here including:

• How to keep agents reading: The Science of Rejection

• How to write strong scenes: Hook the Agent

• How to not stress over comps: Fiction Comps are BS

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